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Can You Drink the Cup? - Week Two

3/16/2014

6 Comments

 
For this week we read Chapters 2 & 3.  Next time we will discuss Chapters 4 & 5.
 
The Cup of Sorrow:

Nouwen says the cup of sorrow is also the cup of joy.  How can this be? 

In writing about the sorrows of Adam, Michael and the others at l’Arche Daybreak, his own personal sorrows, and those of the world around him, Nouwen paints what could be considered a somewhat bleak picture of the human condition.  Our radical aloneness is also a radical interrelationship, for as Nouwen says, “For each of us our sorrows are deeply personal.  For all of us our sorrows, too, are universal.” 

The reality is that this bitterness is often too much for us to bear, and so we never get to the lifting and drinking.  Even Jesus, he points out, tried to avoid it.  However, because of, “a trust beyond betrayal, a surrender beyond despair, a love beyond all fears,” an, “intimacy beyond all human intimacies,” Jesus is able to drink the cup.  What experience do you have of this intimate relationship to God?  Or, how has it been elusive?

The Cup of Joy:

Nouwen continues his discussion of our interrelationship by describing the intimacy of his relationship with Adam.  The level of trust exhibited by Adam for Henri Nouwen exemplifies how our relationship to God should be.  Perhaps this is something of why Jesus says we need to be like children – they know what it is to rely on someone else.  Is it that if we are able to trust, rely on, surrender to God that we will find joy?  Perhaps our sorrows allow us to do just that.

Often we fear messy emotions.  Nouwen’s description of Bill moving from laughter to tears and back again reminded me of my grandfather telling jokes in the funeral home at calling hours.  Life is to be lived, even in the midst of death.  If we have the courage to uncover the sorrow, the courage to face it, the courage to acknowledge its existence, the joy will be uncovered.  The question is, how can we help one another to do this?

6 Comments
Sally White
3/16/2014 01:44:34 pm

It seems that Nouwen experienced that dichotomy of joy/sorrow in his time at L'Arche. I am reminded of a few lines from the poet Edwin Markham: "Only the soul that knows the mighty grief can know the mighty rapture. Sorrows come to stretch out spaces in the heart for joy."

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Cindy Smith
3/18/2014 03:03:47 pm

Yesterday at the funeral of a young woman, age 30, I witnessed just such sorrow and then joy. Adrienne died suddenly and unexpectedly and to add to our sorror, she was planning a celebration of their private marriage ceremony - kind of the "big" wedding she couldn't have at the time. At the wake, there was much sorrow, many tears and very real struggles to understand this part of life. Such was the case at the funeral service. Then it seemed as if once her spirit had been committed to God, we could stop worrying about how we could live with this terrible death and we began to celebrate her life. Our cup of sorrow became our cup of joy. The difference here being that we each did not suffer alone, but in support of one another. We also experienced joy together. I'm not sure if this would be the case if we did not seek the Lord as well as one another in times like this. Perhaps, when we hold the cup alone, we find it harder to really take a hard look at our lives.

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GRETCHEL HATHAWAY
3/24/2014 03:33:07 am

Intimacy with G-d - I have my ups and downs. The most vivid memory was when mom was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer. I was angry with G-d for not giving my mom a few years or even months without an abusive husband. I wanted her to be free of the stress she endured everyday. He was going to outlive her. And within four days of her diagnosis my dad died. Mixed feelings - I would surely miss him in remembrance of his sometimes caring nature, but was relieved that my mom would have a few months in peace. Instead, Mom lived an additional two years in relatively healthy and painfree state, enjoying family reunions and surprise visits from family and long lost friends. I still have mixed feelings, of anger, disappointment, relief, and blessings - and question my initial selfish response. But these feelings brought me closer to G-d, knowing that it is alright for the intimacy to come and go, G-d will always be there for you. Just my thoughts.

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